Open your eyes...

Today, I wasn't feeling myself. I was letting the small things get to me and I was getting depressed for no reason at all. It's okay to have off days. It's just not okay to not look to Him for comfort. I decided to do a few pages in a Bible study book called Stuck that Mary Scott and I have been doing. The page that I opened to said to read Romans 12:9-21. God knew exactly what I needed to hear. 

⁹ Love must be sincere Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. ¹⁰ Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves.¹¹ Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord. ¹² Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer.¹³ Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.

¹⁴ Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. ¹⁵ Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. ¹⁶ Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited.

¹⁷ Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. ¹⁸ If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. ¹⁹ Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord. ²⁰ On the contrary:

“If your enemy is hungry, feed him;

    if he is thirsty, give him something to drink.In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.”

²¹ Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

If you ever have doubt that God is there, open your eyes. Listen. Seek. Pray. Ask for His help and He will reveal Himself. Be obedient. 

Because of some things of my past, I struggle with jealousy. I always look down on myself and think that I'm not good enough. So, when I feel left out, I let it take over my life. Satan can be so deceiving and bring out the worst in you. Don't let him get a chokehold on you. Lay everything down at the foot of the cross. God is willing. God is able. Let go. Give it to God. Whatever it may be, big or small, God will be there to help you through. So if you ever feel stuck or when you feel God isn't there to help, He is. He never leaves you. He will speak to You; all you have to do is listen. He will show Himself to You; all you have to do is open your eyes.

No one said it'd be easy...

Some people think that because we are Christians, we have this perfect life. Wrong. Being a Christian has been by far the hardest thing I've ever done in my entire life. Sin is surrounding us everyday. Temptation is high at every hour. The difference is...we say no. No to what society is telling us. No to living in the moment and living for tomorrow. No to the pressure. No to the media. I believe in Jesus Christ as my LORD and Savior. He died on a cross to take OUR punishment. Our God is so powerful. Think about how big the world is. He has a personal relationship with each and every one of us. And if He doesn't with you, He wants to. So let Him into your life and you will be forever changed. No one said it'd be easy. It's gonna be hard. It's gonna have many trials. We're human. Something I strive for is to constantly be a better person. Stop swearing, it just makes you look bad. Stop having sex, respect yourself. Stop drinking and getting drunk, it just makes you look stupid to others. Stop smoking, it's unattractive. I mean, some of these things aren't always viewed as "bad" in the Bible, but it's just something that I personally think looks bad. If you are preaching the Gospel while drunk, that's like a slap in the face to God. He gave up His Son on the cross to die. Can you imagine? You try sending your one and only son to die. It's not an easy life to live, but your reward will be so much greater than anything this world has to offer. Something my parents always argue about with me wanting tattoos is it is a permanent reminder of a temporary feeling. That same saying can go for a lot of things. You have sex, you are at risk for getting a kid or an STD. A permanent reminder of a temporary feeling. If you get drink and drive, you are at risk for killing someone. A permanent reminder of a temporary feeling. It's not worth it. There is a God who wants all of you. There is a God who has a much greater reward for you. That reward is eternal life. So go out and praise Him today.

Letting God.

Lately, I've been learning a ton about trust. Trust is something that I have been working on for years and I feel can always have growth no matter what the situation. Trusting in God is one of the most difficult things at times. As tour slowly comes to an end, trust has been mentioned a lot recently. Trusting in knowing God has a perfect plan for all of us. Trusting He has control over everything. Living on the same bus with each other for 9 months, the 13 of us have become one big family. I have 12 amazing brothers and sisters in Christ and I would take a bullet for each and every person. We see each other more than a married couple sees each other. We are with each other 24-7...literally. So realizing that tour is slowly coming to an end, it creates a knot in my stomach. Knowing that even if we had a reunion one day, which would be a miracle if everyone's schedules could allow all 13 of us to come, it will never look like THIS again. Some are going to be married, some will be in college, some will be still on tour with a new bunch, but it will NEVER be like this again. Another thing that is going to be so odd coming off of the road is coming to a complete halt. We go from going going going to a complete stop. We got a glimpse of this over Thanksgiving/Christmas break and a small glimpse during Easter. When you are in a different city every night, staying in one place can become the most difficult thing. We go from having a crazy schedule seeing lives being changed every second, to sitting at home, on our couch, watching tv. Some youth groups struggle to even get 20 people to their events. For us, a small show is 300 people. How crazy is that? We see on average 100 kids come to Christ each event. Some people, they are thrilled to even get 1 kid to come to Christ, and it's over a period of months...of praying for them, begging them to come, and getting rejected almost every time. [trust me, I know...I just got out of high school]. We have been so crazy blessed on the road, I cannot even begin to describe. When we go home, most of us will officially be entering what you would call "the real world." After coming from such an exciting year, we all have been learning to trust Him through all of it. Trusting that God is in control and will help us make that huge transition. Another thing that I have been learning is placing everything at His feet and letting God have complete control...which goes hand in hand with the trust thing. Something I have always struggled with is jealousy. I've always looked down on myself and thought the worst. So I would long to get the attention. Back at home, my solid group of Christian friends were ALL guys. It was completely normal for me to be at Bible study with 9 guys and be the only girl. So, whenever one of my friends would get a girlfriend, jealousy could easily set in. I was the only girl in the group and I liked it that way. I felt I was never good enough. I felt that if I didn't get invited somewhere, I wasn't cared for. Obviously, this wasn't true at all. Those dudes are incredible people and would never do something if they knew I felt that way. Jealousy was always a weakness that Satan used to his full advantage and still does occasionally. I have always been very protective of my friends and always felt I would be replaced. So when I didnt get the attention needed, I would have such a hard time with it. The same goes for now, except I'm learning now. I'm learning to lay everything at His feet and realizing that He cares for me. Learning that God is in control of everything. Every emotion, every feeling, every situation, every circumstance. God is in control.

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." -Philippians 4:6-7.

So...I will finish with the famous quote...Let go and Let God.