Don't Sweat the Small Stuff...

The past 2 months have been interesting for me. A lot of change has occurred...and I'm not used to change. 2 months ago, I ruptured my eardrum inflight causing me to not be allowed to work. And if you know anything about me, you know I'm addicted to my job. I am used to working triple overtime and keeping myself busy as well as never home. A week before I ruptured my eardrum, I moved out of my parents' house and into my own place. So here I am...without a job and never living on my own before. And if you know me well enough, you would know that...I don't do well alone. 

Some of my closest friends (those poor souls) have had to watch me be an emotional roller coaster for 2 months now. Having good days and bad days adapting to this new transition, it hasn't been easy on me. There are some days where I absolutely love living on my own and having the day off. But other days, it tears me apart. Because as most of you have probably experienced for yourself, when you are left alone, you are left with thinking...way too much. 

I am an over thinker. 

I think too much about what people think of me. I think too much about my looks. I think too much about if people like me or not. I think too much about everything.

Tonight, I was left thinking too much. After getting upset about something so small, that's when I came to this realization.

Why does it even matter?

Facebook now has the feature to view your old memories of what you have posted on this day however many years ago. Some of the posts that come up on mine are song lyrics that I have posted in the past. And usually, I am able to tell if I was having a good or bad day at that time in whatever year it was. One year ago from today, I posted song lyrics of Twenty One Pilots...

"Sometimes, to stay alive you've gotta kill your mind."

Just from those lyrics, I was able to tell that on this day one year ago, I was clearly thinking too much. The thing about it though is this. If you were to ask me right now what I was upset about or what I was thinking too much about when I posted that, I would have absolutely no idea how to answer you. 

This made me FINALLY realize that yes, things may upset us in life. Or someone may do something that hurts our feelings. We may not get invited somewhere or someone may ignore our text or snapchat. And we may over think when someone says they like our hair a different way or length. But how we handle that emotion is up to us. Is it really worth getting that worked up over? Is it really worth all that heartache and letting the smallest thing eat us up inside? Because if we take a step back for a moment and look at the bigger picture, are you really going to remember what upset you a year from now? However, the moments you will remember are the positive moments. You will remember the laughs and the jokes that were told. You will remember the moments they FaceTimed you for hours on your birthday. You will remember the bonfires with your friends and the songs that remind you of those nights. You aren't going to remember why you were so upset or why you felt so bad about yourself. 

So the advice that I am giving myself tonight as well as everyone else is this (and yes, sometimes the hardest thing to do is listening to our own advice)...

Don't sweat the small stuff. Is it really worth your happiness or even a friendship?