New Adventures.

Well, I promised a lot of people I would keep them updated on tour life and my new life on the road. I feel so blessed to be a part of such an INCREDIBLE team. We traveled the country in basically 4 days...already. I am currently in Yuma, AZ. My host family is absolutely amazing. So blessed already to be meeting such awesome people. We had 2 and 1/2 shows in this area. 151 commitments to Christ the first show, and 29 commitments the second show. God is so good. We had a week off for labor day weekend just to adjust to tour and to hang out with tour team members families and such. It's been cool to see everyone else's home town. Especially the fact 3 of the girls from Yuma lived with me in the past. I was excited to get to see where THEY came from instead of them coming to Pittsburgh. I am so happy I am here. God has called me and blessed me so much, words cannot even describe. I know the road is gonna get tough, but my focus is that I am here for a reason. And tour has been my dream for 2 years now. Dream a dream so big, only God can make it happen. Some of the friendships I've been making is definitely a God thing. He knows that everyone needs someone on tour. Mary Scott has been my rock to lean on:] The entire team is so awesome. Everyone is so welcoming and loving. We make one big dysfunctional happy family now. So many inside jokes already and it's only been 3 weeks. I cannot wait to see what God is gonna do in us and through us.

You're the God of this City
You're the King of these people
You're the Lord of this nation
You are

You're the Light in this darkness
You're the Hope to the hopeless
You're the Peace to the restless
You are

There is no one like our God
There is no one like our God

For greater things have yet to come
And greater things are still to be done in this City
Greater thing have yet to come
And greater things are still to be done in this City

There is no one like our God
There is no one like our God

For greater things have yet to come
And greater things are still to be done in this City
Greater things have yet to come
And greater things are still to be done here

There is no one like our god
There is no one like our God

Greater things have yet to come
And greater things are still to be done in this City
Greater things have yet to come
And greater things are still to be done here.

A New Beginning.

Crazy how tour is starting already! I really don't like when people use the term, "It feels like yesterday when..." BUT...it really does feel like yesterday when I sent in my application for Silver Ring Thing National Tour team. After a few months of praying and praying and praying for Him to reveal my new direction in life, I got a phone call saying, "We'd love to have you on the tour team!" June came along and I walked across the stage to accept my diploma. Not stressing, I thought, I still have 2 months before tour! Those 2 months slowly turned into 2 weeks, then 2 days, then 2 hours! Crazy how time flies by. Training has been going well. 14 hour work days surprisingly go by pretty fast when you are pushing yourself. I'm really nervous for tour. Leaving family behind. But a LOT of prayer has gone into this decision...by not only me, but many workers here at Silver Ring Thing. I know I have a purpose here and God is going to use me in ways I cannot even begin to imagine. I'm so excited to be used for His glory. It is a blessing to be here and I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for Him on the cross. All glory to the One in existence. It's gonna be an EXHAUSTING week, mentally and physically, but we do it for the lives that are going to be changed for good! Thank You Jesus for everything in our lives. My new "family" is gonna work hard to bring glory to Your name. Welllllp, back to work!

Rest In You. [future]

Tossing my cap in the air on graduation day was such a bittersweet moment. We waited so long for that simple moment...and when it came, we cried. We wanted to turn back time and do it all over again...as much as we all said we'd never want to see Moon High School again. It's hard to let go. Memories, laughter, friendships, hallways, teachers, skip days, after school activities, everything. I'm gonna miss it to be honest, which I never in a million years thought I would say. Now that the countdown has begun and everyone will be splitting in a matter of days/weeks, it's a scary thought. I'm nervous. I'm nervous for my future...still. I'm nervous for tour and living on the road. I'm nervous for a lot of things, but I am so encouraged by the main view...God using me. I know He is going to use me more than I could ever imagine. It is one of the hardest things knowing I am going to be leaving behind friends that need me, family that needs me...especially after Pappy died, and leaving home. I'm scared to death. All I am left to do is pray. Pray for strength. Pray for wisdom. Pray for love. Pray for everything to work out the way it is planned. I have to keep focused on the fact everything happens for a reason. I will not rest until I rest in You.

I received a blanket from my Pappy's funeral that says, "Come to a quiet place and rest." -Mark 6:31. It has now become one of my favorite passages. The blanket is gorgeous and has Jesus standing at the gate. Just looking at it gives me peace...about EVERYTHING. I miss Pappy, more than anything in this world. But it was his time. God had plans for him. I was his life. That was proven to me when I weighed 7 pound 11 ounces when I was born...Pappy died July [7] of 2011 [11]. He had to leave. But Jesus was there waiting to greet him and reminding him in that hospital bed, come to a quiet place and rest.

A song that gets me through tough times is one shown to me by a friend, Holly. Thank you Holly...this song, and you, are truly a blessing to me.

Restless by Audrey Assad

You dwell in the songs that we are singing
Rising to the Heavens
Rising to Your heart
Our praises filling up the spaces
In between our frailty and everything You are
You are the keeper of my heart

And I'm restless
I’m restless
'Til I rest in You
(Oh God I wanna rest in You)

Oh speak now for my soul is listening
Say that You have saved me
Whisper in the dark
'Cause I know You’re more than my salvation
Without You I am hopeless
Tell me who You are
You are the keeper of my heart

Still my heart
Hold me close
Let me hear a still small voice
Let it grow
Let it rise
Into a shout
Into a cry

I am restless until I rest in You. <3

God, You are my rock on which I stand. You are my refuge. You are my Savior. My Father. My everything. Thank You Jesus. For wrapping Your arms around me no matter what. I praise You LORD.

Fear.

Someone asked me a question today and it has had me thinking all day. The question was, what is your biggest fear? Now, a general question like that, you would think one would be able to give an answer automatically. I honestly could not think of my biggest fear. I realized that I have multiple fears.
I have a fear of being kidnapped.
I have a fear of being in a natural disaster.
I have a fear of being burned in a fire.
I have a fear of car accidents.
I have a fear of becoming fat.
I have a fear of getting a terminal illness.
I have a fear of dying young.
I have a fear of dying old.
I have a fear of losing a loved one.
I have a fear of bugs.
I have a fear of terrorist attacks.
I have a fear of airplane crashes.
I have a fear of huge roller coasters.
I have a fear of roller coasters breaking.
I have a fear of choking to death.
I have a fear of drowning.
I have a fear of starvation.
I have a fear of hypothermia.

...I think you get my point. I realized I have a fear of just about everything. I later remembered 2 Bible verses that always stuck with me.

"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.”-Joshua 1:9

and...

"Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.” -Deuteronomy 31:6

Now, there are not many passages in the Bible that say the same thing twice. But here, it says, be strong and courageous, do not be afraid. How powerful is that! The LORD is with you no matter what happens to you. It made me realize that no matter what the circumstance, God can always be found hidden amidst the terrifying events. Take the incident Columbine for example. I watched a father of a girl speak about his daughter's death in Columbine and hidden things that happened in their family since the tragedy occurred. One of the things was this girl Rachel always told her sisters, I feel like I'm not going to live much longer. They later found a journal that said, This is my last year here LORD. thank you. Now imagine being that family reading that passage. Later, they also found her bookbag that she had on when she was shot in Columbine. In her bookbag, there was a drawing she had done the previous week. To them and to anyone else, it looked like a simple doodle drawing. They later realized it was a pair of eyes with tears...the tears were watering some type of flower. Doing research, the family discovered it was the Columbine flower...The LORD was calling her before she even knew it. The 2 shooters in the school shot her once, and then proceeded to walk up to her. They lifted up her head and said, "Do you still believe in your God now?" Rachel continued on and said, "Yes." and they shot her in the head. The next words rachel heard was by God Himself saying, well done my good and faithful servant. Rachel was strong and courageous. She had no fear because she knew in her heart that God was with her through that process. Rachel's dad said she had a dream of being an actress and working in missionary spreading the Gospel. He said one day, she was watching Oprah and turned to her dad and said, I'm gonna be on Oprah one day. Her dad forgot completely about it until he was on set at the Oprah show, walked up on stage, and saw Rachel's picture on the big screen. He fell to his knees remembering his daughter saying she would be on the Oprah show one day...sure enough, God made it happen.

Now, another thing I realized about when I was thinking of all of my fears, I realized suddenly I never thought of this key fear...
I have a fear of God.

It is my whole way of living, and yet, I didn't put it? We get too distracted by things in this world to think of the most important. I fear God because when it comes time for judgement day, He chooses Heaven or hell. He chooses eternal life or eternal damnation.

"Fear the LORD your God, serve him only and take your oaths in his name. 14 Do not follow other gods, the gods of the peoples around you;" -Deuteronomy 6:13

It's okay to fear things. But remember to always trust in God. Always know He is with you. Because if you fail at doing that, you are failing Him. When it comes time for YOUR judgement day, did you fear God enough to follow Him and not sin against Him? Did YOU choose not to repent from your sins? Fear God, for He chooses your destiny...

3/15/2011.

Dear Future Husband,
I have been praying for you daily for so long now. I know you are out there somewhere and I pray you are waiting and praying for me too. I've made some mistakes in my past that I hope you can forgive me for. I pray that I can forgive you too for whatever your past holds. I pray that you have a heart of GOD and love Him more than you will ever love me. I am waiting for you. I am so in love with you already and I don't even know you yet. I pray that you will see that love revealed on our wedding day. It's not about the 3 words, "I love you." It's about those 4 words..."You're worth waiting for." I pray we can stay strong and face any obstacles that come our way. I am dedicated to you already. My heart has been renewed by God and I am so Blessed for that fact. 2 years ago, I gave my heart to Jesus Christ, my LORD and Savior. I cannot wait to hear how God has worked in your life and I pray more than ever that we have a Godly relationship. I'm waiting. And I cannot wait to meet you. I love you. More than anything.

Love always,
Your future wife.

The clock is ticking.

For Christmas, we bought my pappy a new watch. My dad told me to throw his old one away, but instead I took it and put it on. My pappy was thrilled I was wearing it. He could tell I wanted it. I wanted it because I always remember him wearing this watch. And when he's gone, I will always be wearing something of his. Well, this watch likes to tick. really loud. When I'm alone at night, left thinking about life, I hear it ticking. It reminds me that our time here is short. And it also reminds me that my time is getting less and less each day with my pappy. He is turning 80 this year and isn't doing so well. It's super hard on me because I'm his only full blood grandchild. My entire family already knows, he DOES pick favorites...and I'm his favorite. I'm his baby, always. Because of this, we are super close. I love him more than anything and I've always taken my time with him for granted...until recently. Everyday, I feel closer and closer to him. Making it harder and harder to say goodbye when I have to. But I can tell he is loving every second that I am taking to spend time with him. I feel selfish at times because I keep praying for him asking to keep him safe and especially healthy. I feel like I shouldn't do this because he is suffering. When Phil passed away, I talked to my pappy about it. And he said, "That's a shame. I'm sorry boots (my nickname). But at least he doesn't have to suffer no more." This conversation with him, I am so thankful for. It was a Blessing from God. It will bring me a peace to when he passes. That he is suffering no more. But I can't bring myself to stop praying for him to stay here with me. I'm selfish. I love him more than anything, and I'm not ready to give him up to God. I can't picture my life without him here. It sucks, big time. All I can do now is pray for strength. And remember, the clock is ticking...

Losing a friend.

This past sunday, our school's world was flipped upside down. A loving friend died in a car accident Sunday night. Phil Walker was known for his kind and caring compassion, always seen with a smile no matter what, basically the energizer bunny from being so happy and energetic all the time. Phil was a friend to everyone at our school and probably many other schools. It has everyone's hearts aching for the loss. But this whole time, I keep picturing Phil just popping out of nowhere and laughing at us for crying over him. I feel like if he were to walk into the room, he'd crack a joke to cheer us all up. I keep hearing his voice and laugh in my head repeatedly. One second, he was there, the next second, he's no longer a part of earth. It really becomes a slap in the face. We need to stop spending our time focusing on the things that don't matter. We need to stop taking things for granted. Live everyday as if it's your last. I'm so worried about my future and it may not even get there. Tragedy occurs everyday but we don't notice it until it happens to us. I keep thinking, "What if it was me?" It could've happened to any of us. But it happened to Phil. God's plan was it was his time. We all don't always agree with His timing but what we can do is make the most out of our time left. We all need to use this for the best way we can. Phil was the greatest guy we knew. Why can't we all be like that? No more social cliques, no more popularity contest, no more separation of love and hate. I really hope this brings our school closer together for the loss of our great friend. So by the end of the year, we are all great friends and would react this way to any one of our classmates. One thing is for sure, Phil will never be forgotten. In any of our hearts.

One thing about Phil is he was a believer. I believe it is what made him the amazing way he was. He was one of the strongest people we knew due to his family situation, but everyday was strong enough to put on a huge smile. He believed in God and everything God had for him. Unfortunately, God had another plan for him that ended his life early. We don't know why stuff like this happens, but all we can do is trust. Trust in the LORD. We shouldn't be mad he's gone. We should be happy for him. He is now at the feet of Jesus. I pray he is happier than ever and dancing for God.

Psalm 116

I love the LORD, for he heard my voice;
he heard my cry for mercy.
2 Because he turned his ear to me,
I will call on him as long as I live.
3 The cords of death entangled me,
the anguish of the grave came over me;
I was overcome by distress and sorrow.
4 Then I called on the name of the LORD:
“LORD, save me!”

5 The LORD is gracious and righteous;
our God is full of compassion.
6 The LORD protects the unwary;
when I was brought low, he saved me.

7 Return to your rest, my soul,
for the LORD has been good to you.

8 For you, LORD, have delivered me from death,
my eyes from tears,
my feet from stumbling,
9 that I may walk before the LORD
in the land of the living.

10 I trusted in the LORD when I said,
“I am greatly afflicted”;
11 in my alarm I said,
“Everyone is a liar.”

12 What shall I return to the LORD
for all his goodness to me?

13 I will lift up the cup of salvation
and call on the name of the LORD.
14 I will fulfill my vows to the LORD
in the presence of all his people.

15 Precious in the sight of the LORD
is the death of his faithful servants.
16 Truly I am your servant, LORD;
I serve you just as my mother did;
you have freed me from my chains.

17 I will sacrifice a thank offering to you
and call on the name of the LORD.
18 I will fulfill my vows to the LORD
in the presence of all his people,
19 in the courts of the house of the LORD—
in your midst, Jerusalem.

Praise the LORD.

We love you Phil<3